Monday, February 15, 2016

Marriage is Not a Two-Way Street

 February 13, 2016
It has been said that marriage is a two-way street. That each party to the union must compromise their morals, values, thoughts, opinions, or whatever, for the sake of harmony. When one party disagrees with the other it becomes necessary for one to give up what they would normally choose so that the union can be successful.
Another common expression is 50/50. Just another way of saying “I’m not gonna get my way but I’ll pretend it doesn’t matter so that my marriage stays intact, and I expect (s)he to do the same.” More recently I have heard that marriage is 100/100 referring to the effort giving to the marriage. Why give 50% when you should give 100%? Well, it’s apples and oranges, isn’t it? Just a play on words.
I have been married now for just over a month and I can tell you without hesitation that marriage is a one way street. She and I are both on the same street going the same direction and in the same vehicle. Our marriage is 0/0. It requires zero effort from either of us and there is no need for compromise.
I have been with this beautiful young lady now for just over three years, although we have known each other for more than ten. While that is far from the experience required to justify expert status in the eyes of most I am not new at the idea of marriage. I have done this before. I’m not proud of the fact that it did not work out the first time, but this time it’s looking up. Some would call me lucky. Lucky to have found someone that shares all of the same thoughts, morals, and values that I possess. It’s not luck. Luck is the reason accidental occurrences happen. I was fortunate. Fortune is the rewards for effort. I was fortunate to have found someone so aligned with me who loves me as much as I love her.
My son has already found his love so this I dedicate to my girls who have yet to tie the knot. I truly hope you never find the need to compromise, instead, find the love in your relationship as I have in mine. Marriage is not a two way street. Nor is it 50/50. It’s the best vacation you will ever take, when taken with the one you love. And to Lisa Vatani Taylor, my wife, who I love and adore, I share the rest of my life. Happy Valentine’s Day.

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